Abusive behaviours
What are abusive behaviours & what are the behaviours to look out for?
This list is not exhaustive as someone who carries out abuse will pick vulnerabilities and tailor behaviours to suit the circumstance.
Using Intimidation
Any behaviour that makes you feel like you are walking on eggshells. This could be a gesture, a look, an act or a couple of words. It could be silence, reprimanding a pet or a child, handling a knife, throwing a drink or a meal you have made away
Emotional Abuse
Verbally abusing you, name calling, putting you down in front of others, lying, gaslighting, cheating, making you feel guilty, blaming you for something you haven’t done, ignoring you, giving you the silent treatment
Isolating You
Controlling who you see, preventing you from seeing your friends and family or not allowing you to go to work. Monitoring all your activities, controlling activities outside the home, using jealousy to justify actions
Stalking You
Turning up where you are unexpectedly, unwanted commenting on social media, turning up at your house or place of work, following you in the car, sending you unwanted gifts or flowers
Minimising
Making light of the abuse, flipping it so you think its your fault, joking about it, making you feel it is normal
Using Financial Abuse
Controlling your money, running up debts in your name, not letting you access the bank account or benefits
Using Threats or Coercion
Threatening suicide if you leave, making you do something illegal, threatening to post pictures of you online, threatening to cheat on you, threatening to hurt someone you love
Using Children
Threatening to take the children away, threatening to hurt the children if you don’t do something, telling the children things about you, relaying messages through the children
Using Pets
Threatening to hurt/kill your pet
Using Physical Violence
Hitting, punching, kicking, biting, burning or choking you
Using Sexual Violence
Forcing you to have sex, forcing you to have sex with others, taking pictures without your consent, threatening to post them online, forcing you to watch porn, making sexual comments about you to others
Abuse is never your fault and regardless of what promises the perpetrator may make, it will probably happen again. We are here to support you.